3 Reasons to Stop Judging People

Judging someone does not define who they are; it defines who you are.

Being Judgemental?

Judging people can be a tricky business. Racing to conclusions about someone can lead to false assumptions.

Here are two stories:

Imagine walking through the woods and you see a small dog. It looks cute and cuddly. You approach and move to pet the dog. Suddenly it snarls and tries to bite your hand. The dog no longer seems cute  and you feel anger. In the next instant, as the wind blows, the leaves on the ground clear to show the dog has one of its legs caught in a trap. Now, you feel compassion for the dog. You know it became aggressive because it is in pain and is suffering.

Let’s move to the next story.

A little girl was holding two apples with both hands. Her mum came in and softly asked her little daughter with a smile: my sweetie, could you give your mum one of your two apples? The girl looked up at her mum for some seconds, then she suddenly took a quick bite on one apple, and then quickly on the other. The mum felt the smile on her face freeze. She tried hard not to reveal her disappointment. Then the little girl handed one of her bitten apples to her mum,and said: mummy, here you are. This is the sweeter one.

In both the stories, our minds made a hasty conclusion which were wrong. But when we waited a little longer we realized our folly. So here are 3 reasons why you should stop making judgments about people:

  1. People will stop trusting you: If you are seen constantly passing judgement, people will stop trusting you.
  2. You will hurt people: Judgments are our own conclusions and mostly negative and they never help.
  3. Judgments are negative. There is almost always something positive you can find in someone or something. But if you are constantly judging then you don’t give positivity a chance.

I like what Marshall Goldsmith said:  “Four words that almost always help people be better leaders, partners, friends, and family members: Help More, Judge Less.